time moves slower here
I'm house sitting again and I feel odd again and I haven't been able to pinpoint what it is about this change in routine and in setting and in me that feels so different. In the morning, I do the same things and I feel the same and I'm alone the same, but somehow when it feels like ten minutes have passed, it is only three, and when it feels like an hour has passed it is only half, and it's really quite lovely but it's also frustrating because I already have an awful sense of time but this makes me feel less like I can trust it.
It's past midnight now (I meant to go to sleep at 11) because I just couldn't get out of the feeling that time will go on forever and I have all of it and it isn't real. I did everything on my to-do list and still had an hour left so I started doing whatever I wanted and I never get to do that so I got stuck. Now I don't feel real.
I'm really excited though. I have enough species for my field notebook, I just need to actually write out the entries. It's nice, I just get to journal about the animals I saw. I am also finally adding my newsletters to my website. I have to think about how I want to go about that. I don't want to share as much publicly as I do privately and I also want to keep the mailing list special. I would love to figure out a way to make it so you can only see the page if you received the initial email, but I don't have the skills for that yet.
yet....
anyway. thanks for reading. let me know if you read this, actually. I forget that that's possible. gimme a toast at least (below) haha.
<3